Maria's Shares · STEAMY Shares

Maria’s Post Holidays – Moving On…!

As much as I love the month of December…

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I legit need a diet because I might or might not have gained some weight from all the festivities.

Also the fact that I got chocolate candy as gifts from ‘Santa’ didn’t help.

I don’t buy chocolate.

If I do… that’s me:

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Until nothing is left but empty wrappers.

And you know what?

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Ok, may be a little bit sorry.

Let’s talk more about gifts, shall we?

My kids have been overstimulated with the amount of new toys they received in December.

It’s insane. It just so happens that my daughter’s birthday is right before X-Mas.

I even took away half of the presents she got from her friends and she hasn’t even noticed!

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Yes, I did it!

And again,

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Because seriously. Our house looks like a toy store as it is.

Oh the joy. Wherever you sit down you get a Lego block up your a$$.

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Also, ever notice how kids sometimes play with a fucking candy wrapper for half an hour?

While they have all these expensive toys?

My kid spent 2 hours playing with this

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Don’t ask.

I tried it and got hit with it in the eye.

My son laughed for 10 minutes afterwards.

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They find the strangest things funny.

Right now they both are in the “bodily fluids are funny” stage.

The amount of times I hear a word poop throughout the day is astounding. lol

I’m gonna change the subject and transition into talking about art now.

My daughter is pretty artsy. And loves mermaids.

So when she brought this picture home from school

I thought,

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“What is this? Are you a mermaid in this picture? Is this your tail?”

The answer, ladies (and gents if there are any here), was much more obvious.

She said,

“Mommy, that’s me – pooping.”

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Yeah. I totally see it now.

And notice how we’re back to discussing poop again?


So, know how sometimes kids talk just for the sake of talking?

I swear half the time while I’m driving I kind of zone them out.

A couple of days ago I was driving and my son kept doing what he always does.

We call it “saying facts” about all random shit.

He says something that makes sense but then at the end he says,


And if you don’t reply he will keep repeating the same shit over

and over

and over

until you do confirm that, in fact, whatever they are saying is right.

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So, naturally, or may be cuz I’m a bit of a fail parent (lol) I sometimes zone out and just keep saying




So we’re driving. And then he’s mumbling and mumbling and mumbling and then I hear one phrase that I very much like.

“naughty daddy”

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MY SON was talking about his father being a bad driver and driving over speed limit.

But me… well, me… I had all kinds of other stuff on my mind.

Jeez, I f’in hope he doesn’t visit this blog.

He helped me buy the domain, so he definitely is aware…

Hubs, if you’re reading this, please, kindly

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Anyways, hope you all had a great holiday season, whatever you celebrate!

I’ll start the year with a new resolution. I’ll quit chocolate.

Just as soon as I eat all of my ‘presents’. :p

xoxo, Maria